Quit Remaking your Tinder, Love will not Algorithmic-ly Swipe onto your Screen

(^ I was talking to me there darling, but since you’re reading, you may be in the same boat)

(or not lol, then, let me be the Willie Wonka of Tinder

Live picture of me, dressed and looking exactly like Willie, about to buy a “Boost” to have an increased chance (max 10x (tinder policy)) of appearing on Tinder feeds.

(lol, hold that thought (sincerely, I am still gonna complete the thought before this thought), im gonna digress a little from the point of this blog and show you this:

Tinder Bans Number 1 Customer

So, I was logging into Tinder, via the PC app (yes they have a PC app), to show you the current prices of “boosts,” which, btw, inflated by like 50% randomly a few months ago and….

?

lol, well, I actually don’t know what I did, other than reactivated my Tinder this morning, to, you know, refresh all the swipes, and, hopefully, turn a left swipe to a right (it’s not gonna happen, (actually, never say never) it may backfire and turn your right swipes into left).

SO here is a never before seen meme:

… ) (Now, where was I?

oh yeah!)

… and show you the shallow world of “paying to advertise yourself just to get left swiped even more (max 10x (thats tinder policy)) than average.

…..

….

*shows no world of Tinder*

Yeah, there is no factory or world here bud,

In the male perspective (I don’t know what male tinders look like), Tinder (straight (the women who clicked that they want to match with men)) women can be categorized into these stereotypes (based on observations

(so, I am a primary source of searching for love/sex on Tinder, as a male who set their match preference to women only,

meaning, this observation can be used in a College paper and be a viable citation (yeah I am digressing hard core (wait, am I

STILL

within the og thought about being Willie and showing you the world of Tinder

or Am finally writing about the point of this blog?)

(I am still in the

thought-ception,

let’s wrap this up and reverse engineer our thoughts back to the point)

Time out: reverse engineering this “thought-ception” to get to the original blog is.. Idk,

idk what I wanted to say, (am I now having a thought within a break from the reality of a thought trapped in even larger thoughts that have no meaning to the purpose of this blog?

(Christopher Nolan, if you’re looking to add a new member into your writing board, you got yourself the man fit to mind fuck people, including himself))

))))

(lol I need to edit this mess when I am more alert)

Tinder (striaght) women stereotypes:

(im getting sleeply, so i’ll wrap this up like a condom over a banana during P.E. Sex Ed (NO JOSE, NO MORE THOUGHTS WITHIN THOUGHTS))

  1. Aspiring Instagram Models
    • These girls blocked all notifications from Tinder, and tinder doesn’t care, because the company uses them to bait dumb men (like me) to keep swiping.
    • Their pictures are taken really well, and organized like caterer organizes food… im too tired… really really well
    • Fuck it, I am not going to talk about TINDER ANYMORE

The Actual Beginning of the Post

Oh my god, there is an annoying static sound vibrating through the air at the moment.

Hold on,

I am gonna move to the patio located behind this Cafe called Whisk in Richmond, Virginia (Near Edgar Allen Poe’s place) that I am at currently. I am feeling the mood to be outdoors, even though it is 100 degrees.

(moves back to the Cafe Patio)

haha well, while I was packing my books and chargers, the sound ceased. But

It goes to show you,

when someone (me) has their mind made up, they are gonna do what they intend, and will make up excuses and reasons to complete their thing.

(I dont know if I truely believe what I just wrote, but I am gonna leave it there)

sorry, I digress (I’m about to complain real quick):

I hate that “WordPress” is retarded in the autosave feature (Look up the definition of “retard” if it offended you and find that I am using it justly) when the laptop ether, falls asleep or switches wifi..

because, If that happens,

everything will be lost, or just to the point where you manually saved it.

Let me show you (hold on, I’m gonna take a screen shot)

(Copies and pastes from WordPress to Grammarly (OP btw (I should use this app more))

Alright, I am gonna save this… Manually.

Good,

Now,

I am gonna head home

because,
it’s 100 degrees outside and

you know,

I made up my mind, so it gonna happen.

Well, lol.

I’m going to end this Blog in a bit.

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

I AM GOING TO BEAT MY DEPRESSION.

So when I arrived home, my best friends were there, with my exes best friends. You know, having a good time.

I decided to cook some food,

they asked me if I wanted to go to this bar called Bold Rock, I believe.

I decline, I wanted to write

and work out

and complete some responsibilities,

You know,

Be a functional and fulfilled version of myself.

But 3-4 hours past by. AND

I didn’t do anything but distract myself with beautiful women online (That I will never ever met, see, or interact with (ever)) (and Porn, porn is a pacifier for ambitions that is easy to access), deleting my tinder then immediately create a new one again (you know, to refresh the swipe feed (but you know, since I did it a lot (understatement) people will notice that they are seeing my face multiple times (ether thinking I’m a robot or insane (both are true)))), then

aimlessly

swipe and hope for love to swipe onto my screen.

Guess what 😉

I just finished this Blog, I beat my depression.

(Oh, and I didn’t get any likes on Tinder yet (I think the app hides people that recreates their account alot) but it’s okay! Because I finished what I started, because I set my mind to do it. Because It’s me. This is Me.)

With Love and Sincerity,

Jose Michael Rubio

P.S. Reading this now, with discovery of being Banned from Tinder, makes this blog post look so innocent. lol, good night folks.

if you’re gonna delete your tinder, make sure it’s for the last time 😉

do it for your mysterious life partner, who you will meet somewhere around earth

in person. (or fall in love with someone on Tinder, lol, that is actually possible too)

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