Sooner than I Think:

I’ll be an Oscar Winning Screenwriter known for my psycho-interpretation films with a passionate cult following (that I’ll flirt with, as a whole (you’ll see what I mean).

I’ll unexpectedly retire at the age of 37 by faking death. I’ll be discovered to be alive at a McDonald’s at my home town in Falls Church, specificly in the one near my childhood home.

In retirement, I’ll continue writing screenplays at a coastal village in Colombia.

However, these screenplays can only be produced after my death.

In my will, the royalties will be given to the Mental Health Foundation, which will provide them with just enough money and resources to discover the cure for Alzheimer’s.

I’ll continue winning Oscars

but I will not know how many

because it’s past my time (there will be jokes about this

(probably about me faking my death again),

I guarantee it).

With Love and Sincerity,

José Michael Rubio